Daily newspapers and the television news.

This beautiful sunny Thursday morning I woke up and looked out the door and saw a blue plastic wrapped newspaper. That made me smile. I almost shouted, "The New York Times is here! The New York Times is here!" I didn't want to scare Felice the cat, so I just got the paper. I know, I sound like such a rube. That's ok I am a rube; country gal living in the city. This is the first day of my subscription.


Half the city of Louisville was outraged Sunday when the paper did not get printed and delivered as usual. Letters to the editor appeared Tuesday and every one was another tale of out of town guests chiding their hosts because this is such a Podunk city we can't get a daily paper printed and delivered. The Courier-Journal had their huge German made, multi-million dollar press go down and no matter what they did, couldn’t get it started again in time to print the "news" sections. We received the pre-printed ads and rotogravure magazine, which were printed earlier in the week. Street sales were printed in Indianapolis. We subscribers received the rest of the paper Monday!


Wednesday there were letters from former paper carriers who told people to get a grip. That was also the day the local Insight cable was down. The report was that sometime during the night the technicians were performing routine maintenance on the router and it died. The back-up router from Lexington died too.


Like all those others I missed having the paper on Sunday to read while watching CBS Sunday, as well as not having television news early before work. I was able to endure without too much upset because I turned on the radio. While scientists tell  us that their studies show people who live orderly lives are healthier and live longer, I don't mind a change in routine.

Things have settled down and Lenny came by last night for dinner, conversation and etc.  He was laughing about my grass having grown so much from recent rains and two weeks of no mowing, as to be almost to my knees.  I told him the thing is I'm short!

Today the grass got mowed and I spent my lunch time sitting on the bench to eat an egg salad sandwich, drink iced tea and smell the scent of mown hay.  My mind wandered to clover and a poem Reggie wrote several years ago about that.  Some lines printed here by permission are:

My lawn has gone to clover.

Alone on a block of manicured lawns

My yard has native grasses.

Its wildness an affront to the orderly.

All the things we do, read, watch, talk about are not that important. I consider myself lucky to have shelter.  The question was asked the other day: Can a person be too rich? I think when someone is so wealthy they are insulated from every inconvenience and there isn't a single thing in the world they could want that they can't have, then a person is too rich.

I think that last line of Reggie's poem describes a worthy goal in our later years; wildness and an affront to the orderly.

Mud was deep and rain was wet.

You may have heard that in Louisville Kentucky the 136th Kentucky Derby day was a rainy day. The race itself was run in the early evening. Just as the twenty horses in the race were walking from the paddock to the gate with all their trainers and owners, the sun came out. This didn't mean the men in their thousand dollar suits and the women in their four inch Jimmy Cho's weren't walking through six inches of deep mud. The jockeys sat atop their chosen horse, clean and dry, while an outrider horse road by a livered helper held their harness. At this point the only hope any of them had of remaining clean was if they were lucky to break from the gate and lead all the way to the finish line. No one was so lucky.

The winning jockey Calvin Borel told a reporter before the race that he was going to wear five sets of goggles and hoped that was enough. He is famously known as "Borail" meaning he rides the rail to win. It is a good thing we don't get a clear picture of this until after the race. He rides that so expertly that it is estimated he's less than three inches from that rail. That is dangerous if you're not talented. Calvin once again was the most talented and won aboard Super Saver.

I had money on the horse. For it is exciting watching a horse I've made a small bet on, run and win in a hard fought race. It is hard to describe the feeling. It is odd too as I wasn't much of a horse racing fan until a few years ago. I owe that vice to my friend Reggie.

We split a bet on every horse in the race. I had suggested this bet in years past and Reggie thought it was wasteful. I always bet a total of $50 on the Derby, spreading my money amongst the horses, but I've never bet every horse. This year he suggested it and I immediately said, "Yes!" He said, "That way we know we will have the winner." I also bet the winner $2 across the board. It paid $32.80. Then there was the $9 from splitting the bet with Reggie. This is the best I've done in the Derby. With the place and show horse my total result was $68.90 for the day.

I know people who pick a horse and think about betting but never do. My sister was one of those. She posted on Facebook that she had the winner, but never placed a bet. I'm not sure why not but I'm not going to question her because I'm not sure I could keep from laughing. I know I'm not nice about this.

The famous and nearly so, schlep into town and after they sober up, schlep out of town. As with other humongous touristy events in other places, public relations professionals and party planners convince them to attend the Derby Week parties and walk into Churchill Downs on a red carpet. They are resplendent in finery and have entourages trailing behind. Local news heads confront them with a microphone and camera streaming live interviews and basically ask, "Who are you betting in the big race?" It's mind numbing. There have been some genuinely famous people attend this thing but this year, it was a herd of B-List reality show has been's and the fading famous. Maybe I don't watch enough television. The one person I knew was Diane Lane, who was one of the Grand Marshal's in the Pegasus Parade, Thursday.

Tomorrow all we who live in Louisville will return to our lives and turn our attention to politics and the latest natural or unnatural disaster in the world. Indiana holds its primary election Tuesday and I look forward to no longer having to endure their endless commercials. No worry. Kentucky's primary is May 18th and I'm sure all those vacant TV spots will be taken up by our candidates.

Rain continued after the races last night. Having gone to bed with a book at the usual time, I was awakened by the cat about 1 a.m. She seldom sleeps near me but last night she was either on my feet on perched on the back of the divan watching. Thunder storms raged and I finally turned on the light and read. By 5:30 a.m. it was still raining and the television was a blast of angry red, which meant storms were moving through the state with flash floods. It is still raining now. Grass is already over my shins in the yard. Maybe renting a rake and hay bailer would be a good idea.

Glaring guilt repeated all over again.

The bank executives appeared before the Senate today. There were several of them sitting at the same table facing the Senators. They stood together with their hands raised for the oath to tell the truth. That scene reminded me of the big tobacco executives who did the same in front of a Congressional committee April 14, 1994, and then lied when all five were asked to state their take on nicotine being addictive. Each repeated "I believe that nicotine is not addictive." Later their own corporate documents stated it was addictive and all the men swearing it was not knew it was. Today the investment executives' testimony was broadcast on CNN. I watched it on my office computer, primarily just listened to the testimony as I did other things.

Most of these men were no longer working for Goldman Sachs, and spoke of what they recalled about the two deals that were investigated by the SEC. In particular the Senators were interested in e.mail published this week end by the New York Times, where their salesmen described the investment they sold to unsuspecting investors, as a "shit deal". Senators Carl Levine and Claire McCaskill said "shit" in their questions. I liked it that they said those words. I would have liked it if a Senator had said, "You are fucking thieves."

All the executives were asked if they felt they had any culpability in the crash of the markets and the losses investors had from buying these investments which they knew were "shit deals" from the beginning and while they sold them. Each said in a flurry of carefully crafted words they had no feelings of guilt for what they did. Their answers were basically what a 5 year old child says when their mom chastises them for lying, "Everybody else does it."

I wonder of these men have children. Are they raising those children to follow in their footsteps? How do they justify their actions to those they respect?

Current and former employees within Goldman Sachs' mortgage and derivatives divisions testify in front of a Senate committee - Daniel Sparks, Josh Birnbaum, Michael Swenson and Fabrice Tourre (from left to right).

Littering in the dark.

In the dark, outside my apartment, cars circle and stop to park in the lot. I have watched them from the first floor before. They will sometimes park in pairs, one facing the road and one away from the road, so that the driver side windows are close. I see the burn of a cigarette in the dark and have heard the drivers of the cars talk to each other. Who these cars belong to is not known. If they are the private security police, as I suspect, a balloon full or water or maybe a firecracker would be appropriate. Wherever the cars park on the lot, the tell tale signs of a meal eaten remains in the morning; fast food packages and bags litter the space.

Less than a block away the paper reported an assault last week. A woman walking from the Kroger store with a bag of groceries pushed down and her purse stolen. It was at night about this time. Were the police cars circling down there that night too?

I think I will go sit on a bench and wait for them to come tomorrow night. Then stepping from the darkness I'll approach and inquire as to what exactly they are doing parking here on the lot instead of patrolling. I have no fear they will shoot me. The private security police aren't allowed to carry guns.

Saturday morning I got to see some friends and meet a new one at breakfast. There was a time when every Sunday I'd have breakfast with a constant though changing group of friends. We did that for at least six years and then stopped. That was a time when after Dennis died and I had finally gotten free of Roger, I could count on being in the company of people who meant me no harm and helped me function in the world. I had been a wife for over twenty years and though we had friends, they were couple friends. When I started seeing Roger I walked into his room and closed the door. I don't lay blame in this for I know I was a willing victim. The fact still remains, my breakfast friends saved me.

It took a long time for me to feel good in my own skin. I've often told people I could write a book about all the things not to do when you are widowed. I think I broke every rule and made every mistake. There isn't a way to warn someone though. I made mistakes and I forgive myself for them.

Today was a beautiful morning. Having gone to mass yesterday afternoon, I was able to relax reading the paper and listening to the CBS Sunday program playing as background music. Lenny came over and we read the paper together, eating bagels and drinking coffee. It was a lovely day. His daughter is having her first cook-out at her new home this evening. He said he was going to like her hamburgers and hot dogs, even if they were inedible. I told him that was expected of Dad if he was a gentleman. He is, so it won't be a problem!

My friends are such a blessing to me.

Coupons and other crazyness.

The week before, the week before Derby is the last chance anyone living in Louisville Kentucky can do real work. To some extent this also includes the entire state and the southern half of Indiana. After Thursday of this week anyone living within the area will be totally useless for anything but hosting out of town friends, celebrating, talking about and watching events set up for The Kentucky Derby Festival. This also means that a large number will be inebriated for two weeks. A girl I used to work with would take one week of her vacation Derby Week every year. She said she got more free drinking and sex than she got the remaining fifty-one weeks. A friend who reads Craig's List regularly, said this past Monday that the out of town working girls are already set up and advertising for men who want that special hospitality only money will get you.
Poll worker training was scheduled this week. I went this morning. Others are going tomorrow. This is a well rehearsed, well organized necessary class for all people who are working at the polls for the Primary Election, May18th. We gathered like polite strangers, sat and completed forms, answered questions in pencil, stood and swore we had not fought or facilitated a duel in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. More words of the oath were about the possible duel than the honest fiduciary responsibility we accepted with it. A video played for thirty minutes and we were out of there.

I am hopeful that before I am too old to work the polls we will be able to complete this process in some non-congregating way. Perhaps we can use Skype as we assemble in our homes to take a computer class in our jammies? Really though, it wasn't a bad way to spend a beautiful Tuesday morning. I got to see a part of town I used to live in and notice all the businesses that had changed in the past twenty years.

The coupon thing involved using a $1 off coupon for a hamburger at Steak'n Shake. The coupon said Chipotle hamburger, but it wasn't listed on the board. I asked for it and said I had a coupon. They said we'll get right on that. No mention of the price. When I asked for a small salad instead of French the waiter said that wasn't allowed without extra cost. So although we are promised in ads that Steak'n Shake makes the food after you've ordered, they are inflexible on what they will allow to be paired when using a coupon. It's a shame the cat doesn't like French fries!

I am convinced that marketing companies who set up the coupon offers for retailers are former idea people for credit card and free checking account companies. There are restrictions and limitations printed in print only a person using a laser light under a magnifying glass could read. We will give you $1 off that package of egg noodles, but you must also buy a package of cheese from a company you've never seen on the shelves of your local market.

It seems that "special" offers and coupon discounts are all bait and switch in the new tradition of the phrase.

A Plane nearly does not land safely, then does.

Wednesday this week, I'd had a full day of real work and worry about taxes. I had finally got home and was enjoying a sit down in the comfortable chair with a glass of ice water. Really, when it's 86 degrees in April, a glass of ice water is wonderful. Anyway, I was watching the last of the local news. It was moments before the national news was to come on.

A local news head announces with their personal version of hysteria, "Breaking news developing now! A UPS plane has notified the air traffic controllers of a possible emergency. The airport is preparing for a crash landing!"

The next fifteen minutes were spent with live action watching a 767 UPS plane approach the runway and land. This meant the CBS national news up to the first commercial break wasn't shown. Reggie said he was watching the NBC affiliate and the national news was broadcasting two sides to a political question and every time they were showing his preferred side, they broke away to the plane landing.

Since then the local stations have been running ads patting themselves on the back for showing the plane land safely. An airplane safely landing happens thousands of times. It is not news. If that plane crashed and all the online purchased packages burned, I'd want to see that.

We here in Louisville need about an hour and a half of local news a day. More than that is an extended commercial.

Another blogger I read had a post this week about all the live stand up reports on travel delays at European airports due to an Icelandic volcano's belch. She said that every small airport in Briton had a segment where a live stand up reporter said, "Same here. No one is leaving the airport!" That's as funny as the breaking news of a safe airplane landing in Louisville!

All the Tax Day drama is over here. My friend the CPA filed extensions for me. The government has my money so I'll hopefully not suffer any penalties. I have a pretty boring life regarding money matters, but somehow it becomes drama every year.

My other CPA friend from a northern state, called Friday. I don't talk to him often but every year the day after Tax Day we seem to talk. He told me his cat died. He said she was 14 and was ill. They'd been working with her trying to save her and the vet wanted them to leave her over night so the could give her another therapy. They got a call late to come get her as she was wigging out in the cat cage. So they went to get her and she was riding in his wife's lap in the car on the way home. She was talking to the kitty and it seemed content. Two blocks from the house the cat died. Now he's all broke up about it. His daughter who's away at college says they killed the cat by leaving it at the veg hospital and now she can't stand coming home this summer and has gotten a job in her college town on the east coast. I could hear tears in his voice. I told him his daughter was 22 and was looking for a way to stay away. It was normal and not to sweat it.

I said, "You know what you got to do now, don't you?" He said they were getting two new cats. I told him to get mutts. They'd always had Siamese and this was the second one to die of the same ailment. I told him all my cat owner stories and he got to laughing at me. I think they will be ok with the new cats and hopefully his daughter will come back home when she runs out of money or gets pregnant.

This week end kicks off The Kentucky Derby Festival. This is about three weeks of uncountable events leading up to the Kentucky Derby. I like thoroughbred horse racing; watching, betting and even loosing on small horse race bets. I do not care for all the festival stuff. Maybe, if it involved nudity on a grand scale or some other truly spring fertility event. But, this is Louisville Kentucky, which exists under the cinch of the Bible belt, so our nude worship of Baucus is done either behind closed doors or accidentally on a river bank and within the oval infield at Churchill Downs.

Yesterday was Thunder over Louisville. That means seven hundred thousand people went downtown and onto the bank of the Ohio River to watch a wide variety of civilian and military planes fly around all day. At about 9:30 p.m. fireworks were launched for about thirty minutes in a technological marvel of music and explosion. Then for the next four hours, all those people tried to get home.

In the past Dennis and I watched from roof tops or in the offices of friends in buildings a couple of blocks from the river. Then I began watching from my apartment high up in a building in the Highlands. Now, I don't even do that. I keep saying I'll have a watch party, but everyone I know likes to be out near the event. Maybe the watch party will work when my friends are old.

What I did was cross the river early Friday evening, head north and spend the night and some of Saturday with Lenny. He had some work to do for a friend whose dad died, so I just tagged along and read my book, kept him from getting sleep. We went out to eat for dinner and then breakfast.

Sunday in Louisville is a beautiful thing in April. The excitement of the Derby hovers in the air like a pink mist along with tree pollen and butterflies. Yes! I saw my first butterfly this morning. It was small, yellow and fascinated with a wild grapevine growing at the side of a building.

Republicans making suggestions for our own good.

Today Hillary Clinton was suggested as a Justice on the Supreme Court. Let that settle in a bit.

Secretary Clinton is a smart woman. She got her education, including advanced degrees, worked as a lawyer, and held for eight years a rare yet important and uncompensated job as First Lady of the United States. She was NY Senator for eight years, ran for president with all the boys and now serves as our Secretary of State.

Sen. Orin Hatch says he would vote for her. He's the one who suggested Hillary.

Mrs. Clinton is doing an excellent job as Secretary of State. She is out on planes visiting heads of states and diplomatic hot spots all over the world. She even shook the hand of Sen. Mitch McConnell, Senate Minority Leader last week. She was in Louisville to give a speech at the McConnell Center at the University of Louisville. Hillary and Mitch traded compliments with each other on the podium. When I saw that photo I was afraid I'd fallen asleep and woke up in Oz.

All this Republican glad handing and smiling comments to prominent Democrats makes me uneasy. Luckily Hillary is doing a good job. She's always done a good job for the country. She is needed too badly to be nominated to fill a seat on the Supreme Court.

I've been working with my CPA friend on my taxes. He always runs late. My husband was an accountant and for the first twenty plus years of my tax paying life, he did the taxes and all I had to do was sign them. In addition to owning and co-running our business he did taxes for lots of people. It was always a stressful time with he talking to the clients, filling out the forms on a typewriter, with me making copies and collating, etc. Things have sure changed in two decades. The only constant is the stress of the last few days toward the deadline.

Ya'all may not see much of me as the fifteenth approaches.