Thursday, June 10, 2010

Naked; when you have nothing to wear.

A naked six year old walked into a bar last night. Bar patrons put a t-shirt on him and went looking for his family. Not locating them, they called the police who canvassed the neighborhood finding an open door to a home down the street. Inside three juveniles were found. No parent or adult was there. A half hour later he child's mother arrived. She had left her children in the car of the oldest one, a twelve year old. Social services investigated and the children were returned to their mother.

This evening the local news led with the story: "A six year old naked child walked into a bar."

Yes, the same child again walked into the same bar.

When I first heard that line I thought, "That's a good line for a joke."

Somehow I can't think of one now.
Sometimes reading the paper captivates me. This morning I read an article beginning on the front page of the NY Times. It was about a way that regular schmo's can be sharp dressers. No longer will he depend on a wife or girlfriend to tell him what goes with what and suggest how to coordinate his colors.

After signing up to Trunk Club's site, a personal fashion assistant interviews him by Skype. During the conversation he explains likes, his activities, business dress needs and produces his measurements. She evaluates what he looks like and discusses his needs in more detail. A short time later he takes delivery of a large box of slacks, shirts, shoes, jackets selected specially for him.

Anything that he doesn't want gets shipped back. He pays nothing extra for the shipping or the personal fashion assistant.

Our featured schmo in the article was the writer. In "The Man, the Mouse and the Wardrobe" Farhad Manjoo follows the process. There are other sites doing similar services. You wear only black socks? Get new socks every other month from a subscription to You are constantly wearing out your undershorts, t-shirts and socks? Work with The subscription services for basic needs work like a book of the month club.

Until these sites became available men who had no discernable sense of style found themselves in the local department store or Men's Warehouse when needing a suit for that funeral or job interview. When he had no matching sock pairs or hole free underwear, they went to Target at midnight, stocking up on packs of Hanes. Because most guys buy clothes only when they can't find anything to wear, sharp dressing is something they seldom do.

Now a guy can shop using Skype and a short time later he has clothes that are his size and make him a well dressed man.

Mr. Manjoo also says gift certificates to these services are perfect for the recent graduate or birthday boy.

This sounds like a good idea of busy men. Most all of us use online shopping more than we ever thought we would.

I buy books, office supplies, some basic clothes, and all those must have Target sales items. The biggest draw for me is I keep myself on a strict budget. When I'm not cruising the isles of the big box store with a huge bascart, I don't buy things on impulse. The additional plus is free shipping!


  1. soemone needs to lose custody of those kids...

    ohhh, nice boots

  2. I am shocked that child was returned to his mother. That would never fly here where I live.

  3. I thought you were leading into a joke about the boy in the bar. Wow.

    I wonder if they offer services like that for women? It'd be perfect for me. Kind of like "What Not to Wear" without the TV show and public embarrassment (or, sadly, the free clothes).

  4. The 12 year olds car or care? Both are pretty bad...

  5. i would think that a university grad would know how to dress himself. as a color blind man i frequently came home with purple stuff that was on sale. i learned to ask the ladies what color the item was. it turned out to be a great way to meet the ladies.

  6. It's a good thing the Evil Twin has me to shop for him. I bought 2 shirts for him the other day and he said, "I would have picked the same colors." I know him like the back of my hand.

  7. YELLOWDOG GRANNY: I haven't heard the local news today. I used to babysit three children under the age of 5 when I was 12 and get paid for it. Maturity levels of 12 year olds is a subjective thing though, so who knows if the child is up to it.

    Senorita: Yep, it is a bit shocking and I bet it won't happen now.

    Just a Girl: I know! That's the best first line to a joke I've heard lately but I can't think of a joke to follow.

    Urban Cynic: It should be "care" not "car"!

    Billy Pilgrim: I agree but maybe now days guys don't get taught how to dress when younger. As to color blindness, Lenny is color blind but dresses very well. His kids used to go with him though and loved telling him that orange shirt looks really good with the ocean green tie!

    Evil Twin's Wife: I guess if a guy can't coordinate colors he's less likely to get a wife who can do it for him the rest of his life?

  8. Just stumbled over from Blogging Incognito - nice blog! It all does sound like a good idea, but my heart aches a bit at the prospect of men like my bright red shirted and bright green panted dad going extinct, I gotta admit!

  9. sounds like I need to use that site..I hate shopping!

  10. tattiara: Thanks. I applaud diversity and if it's your style you live or don't by it. I think the purpose of the sites are to provide order to the fella who would otherwise spend his life in sweat pants and flip flops.

    Just telling it: I hate shopping too. I may move to a remote yet accessible place and do all my purchasing via online sites and UPS delivery!

  11. I just got back a pair of old jeans that I had a 85 year old woman patch up for me. The knees, back portion, crotch, and a pocket were shot all to hell but they were comfortable. This isn't the first time that I've had her do some serious blue jean mending. The jeans look good with my black steel toed boots, ya know. I wonder if there are any on-line services for men that dress and work like me?

  12. Keith: You need to remember this article was published in the NY Times. So they are thinking like New Yorkers. It's a good way for guys without style or time to get fixed up with a wardrobe. Kinda that business model of "find a need and fill it."

    I personally like eclectic dressers; gives 'em a personality.

    As to finding a person to patch you up, I betcha that's available in some way on line.

  13. Naked 6-y-o: I'm sure you could work out some joke about the Second Coming

    On-line dresser, etc.: I'm known as an individual dresser (whose blithe innocence shields me from knowing what a 'schmo' is) but then much of my outerwear comes from the USA.

    Happy Sunday

  14. I prefer the ocean and beach..if you move there let me know I like to visit people...

  15. A 12 year old baby sitting is legal, but obviously this particular 12 year old is incompetent. I can't believe it happened a second time.

    I know some men who could use that service.

  16. I'm compiling of list of my male friends who could use this service...this could take a while....

  17. Just telling: I prefer the mountains!

    Secret Agent Woman: I agree.

    Anything Fits a Naked Man: The men I know, know how to dress. Sigh.

  18. Dressing for a man is so much easier than a woman. As Joy Behar said: schpritz under he pits and out the door.

    Let's not pretend men are helpless - maybe lazy, but not clueless. Oh, yeah, they need help picking socks. Give me an effing break. Looking presentable is a woman's job? Please.

  19. Sadly, I can believe Social Services returned the child to the mother - deeply depressing as it is. By the time the paperwork required to remove him was completed, he'd probably be 18, anyway..

    Moving from London to live on a sleepy island, I gladly discovered on-line shopping, and now it's my main method of shopping - not by necessity, but out of choice, I've always hated shopping - now I even order my groceries on-line.. it's WONDERFUL!!

  20. Wolynski: I would never say men are helpless. Like women they are able to do whatever they put their mind and effort to. I don't expect women to dress better than men or men better than women.

    Shrinky: Who do you order groceries from? I've used to buy pantry staples and laundry detergent but the milk, eggs, etc., aren't available. There is luckily a local store who delivers groceries and I shop monthly. I always seem to be have to run by the grocery for an item or two between big shopping days.

  21. I always look good no matter what I am wearing. Cheers Charlene!!


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